Category Archives: CSH3 – Saturday

I don’t think Alice likes hashing in Chiang Mai… Whenever he comes to town he spends more time haring than he does hashing! I want to see you out on trail! When I got to the football field, Turkish immediately grabbed me with bribes for a good write up – handing out T-shirts! Great T-shirts, how about the run? 😉

The football field isn’t likely to be virgin, but there are plenty of good trails around there. We set off around the running track, with Gorf leading us to the trail on the road. Along the road and the first circle. Options… We have run to the left to through the field plenty of times before – and each time been shouted at by the buffalo herdsman. It *could* be to the right, afterall Turkish had been promising “virgin” trail… I opted for straight – and sure enough got one right. Feet pounding behind me and Gorf was on me – go ahead I thought, you can find the false trail… – Sure enough there was a false trail, but I picked the wrong correct trail heading towards the hills until Graven called us back towards the trail along the bottom of the hill.

I ended up mid pack when we turned to the hills. I was feeling the huge lunch I had at a meetup with former students – I’d left most of it on the floor at the A-site, but still wasn’t feeling too good. There may have been checks, but I didn’t notice many as I trailed the pack into the hills – not so bad as the trail was great! Well marked and really good running (walking). Finally I caught up at a check – it had been called to the right, but I got there as the FRBs came back announcing a false call. The pack scattered, and I set off on a little trail off to the left. A nice little trail that arced around the ridge. No sign of paper though I heard the call to my right, and kept arcing right towards the call around the mound for about 50m and found a Xmas Circle check.

I wasn’t going back at this point. I started checking, and moments later heard Graven approaching. Some might call it a short cut, others would call it superior hashing… Graven, Brownie and Gorf soon joined me when I paused to picked a grass seed from the sole of my foot. They were oozing with testosterone to the point HRA was scrambling to get out of their way as they stormed back from a false trail. I got down to the road not far behind – I thought… The check still intact and faint calls from the left being drowned out by temple disco. Was it back down the road, or along the trail? It sounded like the road to me, so I set off. It wasn’t the road, but from there I kept going and headed OnIn.

Lovely trail, an impressive pack of FRBs. Too bad Alice missed the circle – I don’t think the hares will go looking for people next week!

Toe Sucker conspired with Square Rooter to set tonight’s run from along the Sameong Road. I missed one sign and nearly ended up at the football field, but fortunately backtracked in time and found the A – I wouldn’t want to miss this one! The run was excellent, using some familiar trails, but from a different direction, making the connects very interesting – and some of the checks were genius!

We set off, and the first check took no time, with Turkey running just ahead of me. At the 2nd, I set off to the left, but it looked a bit overgrown so I was slow checking. Meanwhile Turkey went to the right and went a couple of hundred metres before calling us on because he saw some paper – sadly the paper wasn’t showing the trademarked square root symbol! Checks are intended to confuse, and this one did just that! With people scattered, I went back to the previous check, and with most following we sure enough found the right trail. Sadly Turkey led some boys astray and they managed to short cut ahead of us.

We caught up at another check, where there was again much confusion. Able Semen called us On, only to find Turkey stood sweating halfway up a hill denying all knowledge. We were 15 minutes into the run and had barely started. Pamela and Swallow were right with the FRBs debating going back and getting the beer! Finally Cumalot and I set off up another “hidden” trail and found paper. Brownie was right with us, but Cumalot struck gold at the next check as the trail headed up the hill. A big climb – one where I just put my head down and waited for it to be over. Trudge, trudge, trudge…

Eventually we hit the ridgeline, and for some reason most were wanting to check to the right… No way! I thought, I recognise this place – we run here from Ob Kham – great connect SR! Off to the left shuffling away was Cuckold – it had to be left… (The Wimp trail had broken left, so ours had to sooner or later, and to go right meant dropping down into Ob Kham valley – not even SR could come up with a way out of that??? I started chasing Cuckold, and grinned to myself when he called us on. Graven behind me, and took off as though our chains had finally be cut. Cuckold’s shuffle shifted into a determined gait, and then a definitive jog, before he broke out the full on run – he was free! Finally running, sprinting with all the calibre of an FRB! Determined to get to the next check first, which he did…. and then the next, which he did… but he got that one wrong, and I didn’t see him again – still great running with you!

Brownie got it right, but was an eternity before he called it. The lead rotated as now Graven got involved – we were descending, and we were descending fast. Another check, and Able Semen was reluctantly checking slowly, so I overtook and found trail. Still downhill, so while I going as quick as I could, Graven, Able Semen and Poo past me – then Poo realised he might be going just a bit too quick and took action to avoid falling. There was the hare, sweeping backwards, so he said… – I think he was just hanging out on trail to try and decoy us. With a tiny hint from the hare, I found trail and another circle. If you’re reading this SR – you know the circle I mean… just after we met you, where you had a FT straight off the circle… That was a bit confusing, but it would have been even more genius if you hadn’t had the circle….! The trail into the gully, and to the FT. Everyone would have gone back to the main trail. Whatever, it was still genius and brought the pack closely together as everyone was sure we were into the end game.

The last couple of circles had me foxed. I knew we were close, but didn’t recognise enough to know where the A site was. Seriously, excellent, excellent job! The trail had everything – a hill, lots of good running, some excellent checks to get the brain going. Pure hashing joy.

Stumbling Wicket teamed up with Pamela for another run down at the end of the canal road. I missed the first sign, but managed to get to the runsite in time for a slightly tardy start. Looking around no sign of Graven, Brownie or Piggy… The early FRB was Diddly Squat – so intent on getting a fast breakaway at the start that he completely ignored trail and had to be called back. Poo and I led the way through the first couple of checks, but as I kept getting them right, calls faded behind me – where were the other FRBs?

Time to be brought back to earth with a couple of good checks that brought the pack back together. Some German visitors were among the leaders, with Poo, Taste My Buns and Cuckold. Poo took the lead at one point and promptly got the next check wrong. I always seem to get a little disoriented on the trails there. We were running in the same area as last week, and the trails crossed each other several times, but there was no evidence of the previous week, and everything looked different from a different direction.

Excellent job by the hares.

Cumalot & Knockout teamed up for a run way down the “end” of canal road. A familiar runsite, in the quarries where Pamela set a successful moonlight run. When I got there, the fire department were on hand hosing forest fires – would the trail be ok?

We set off, and the first check was a no-brainer… – right? We had to go right up to the forest and the trails there? I checked well over the 100, right up to the corner, with no sign of paper left right or straight. Turning back, it seemed like others were reluctant to try left – surely it wouldn’t be left? It was left, heading towards the roads, and we ran all the way around the temple complex. Brownie was leading, but the pack was close behind – particularly when he momentarily became blind and didn’t see the paper right next to him.

Sure enough after we’d run around the temple, we were heading towards the nice trails. There was a period where I was checking the wrong way and then needing to overtake the pack to rejoin the FRBs, until finally the FRBs broke loose. I caught HRA, Brownie and GI at a great check – great for me! Brownie and HRA headed left – I would have been very impressed with the hares had they found a way to go there… GI headed to the right, but I remembered a trail that was almost straight, slightly hidden, but you need to do a quick left/right… I was confident so a slowed to a walk until I saw paper “ONON” and set off. Finally leading the pack again. The trail heads right and as it rejoined the trail that Graven had been checking, sure enough, he was there… still checking!

I ran along with Graven, and we got to a circle – already kicked out…. wtf? Further on another circle – already kicked out… wtf? When short cutters decide to kick out trail it only spreads the pack out and fucks up the efforts the hares had put in. Lets face it – the hares put in checks to slow the front runners down – if someone goes and effectively takes those checks away, it fucks up the trail for the FRBs, it means the other runners don’t keep up so easily and miss out on part of the fun, and it fucks up the efforts of the hares.

Turkey got a few checks right, and we were following him for a while until he got one wrong and the trail headed left. We all wanted to go right, but after there were no calls we cut off to the left where we found a 2nd circle up on the open “road”. Finally we heard a call from even further to the left – HRA had figured it out, found the check and found the trail. I headed in that direction, only to find a gorge between me and the trail. I tried to find a way across as GI and Turkey came over. GI also started looking for a way to get to the start of the trail, while Turkey scrambled around a house to intercept the trail further on. The gorge was impossible, so we had no choice but to follow Turkey around the house and rejoined trail after navigating past a fence.

NOYB ran past as we rejoined the trail, so it was nice to see that the confusing checks had allowed the pack to get back together. Another check and all logic said turn right. We could see Turkey Delight running away from us, around 100-150m away. We called “ARE YOU?” No response.

The trail today was great! The hares did a great job of setting a great route – well marked, a lot of fun and good exercise! Great job hares!

Pretty sure this was the first Cuckold run I’d been on, so it would be interesting to see what he’d picked up in his hashing days. He picked the football field on the Sameong Road – ***Temple Steps*** flashing before my eyes. The night before I was already visualising the pain of the climb. The hare was there early… ready… primed with war paint on his face… harebrief well prepared and then orchestrated with perfect attention to detail. He then pointed towards the temple and set us off.

We turned quickly away from the temple, and headed towards the bamboo bridge that normally marks the end of runs there. The bridge has seen better days… Today it was falling apart before a gang of hashers took it on. I am very grateful that Brownfinger waited for me to get across before adding his weight to it. I was slow, as I normally am over such obstacles, but it held my weight. Having crossed I had an advantage and set off while the rest went one by one. A circle check, and I got it right. We looped around to the left, and by the next check I was 90% confident it would be right through the gully. None of Your Business was running along behind me, so I let him go the wrong way. RoundFinger was chasing me down, but I got to the next junction ahead of him, and for sure it was right – time for Brownie to go the wrong way. I found trail and we headed up over the small hill. Next circle check I made a mistake I won’t make again, and checked a deadend to the left. Damnit!

When we hit the concrete wall, KO & NOYB stalled – it had to be right, so I chased off after Piggy who was leading – except for Graven & BowWow who suddenly appeared ahead… Some excellent running or some intelligent short cutting? Up the hill again, only to turn back and go down… Were we going to go down the steps? or up the steps? We were back down to the flat lands, running smoothly, and there was the hare… Like a spirit master he was urging us to turn left onto the R(ambo?) or R(unners?) trail… The other option was the W(imp) or W(alk) trail. The real FRBs set off and were given a taste of the temple steps. I opted out… Turkey opted in, briefly, and then opted out and joined me for a beer while we waited.

Excellent set – very clearly marked, and some good checks. Local libraries stock the “Haring Bible” authored by Square Rooter, that states clearly to put the pain in the early part of the run, so that hashers forget it by the time they get back.

Double check the hareline – yes, the miniballbreaker was set by Mr. Poo on 7th November… Today was a regular run by Pigshit… Maybe I didn’t get the memo? The hare was cautious in his harebrief recommending us to take the Walker trail if we weren’t feeling fit – perhaps we should have listened to him? A site was the hexagonal shelter in Ob Kham. I set off with Turkey sprinting off only to remember he still had his car keys, so he turned back. I figured I may as well keep going, and the first circle was exactly where expected. I thought I could see something on the trees to the right, and sure enough I was on. Up the hill, may as well keep on running there is bound to be a check at the top of the rise. I opted to go to the left – there are 2 trails there, and if one is wrong you can normally see the other trail.

Ack, no sign of paper, so I figured I would go around the hill and join the pack the other side. What was that up ahead? A big of paper? From this run? Strange… It was too far.. Surely I wasn’t on… I looked back, and only then saw the line of paper leading to where I was… ONON… I got the next check right as well, and was cruising along nicely until I got one wrong. Turning back, I got back to the circle about the same time Chuckie called. Apparently it was a public toilet as Mr. Poo & Naheman were taking a break rather than checking. The pace was quick for the hash. With Chuckie leading the way there was a great check – surely not that way, it would be back to the left. Another one I got right, and dragged Graven along with me. We ran up and down over the small hill by BJ farm. Damn this pace was quick – I don’t think I am fit enough for this…

Had to use everything to my advantage. I had already guessed where the Wimp Rambo split would be – I was right, and headed towards it. Luckily the trail also went that way and we ran as a pack with Sloppy, Graven, Poo, KnockOut, Naheman, Chuckie all in close order. After the split, there was a circle. I pushed on to make sure I got the first choice, and went straight. Chuckie followed not wanting to check the trail to the right… Finally I (we) were wrong, and turned back to hear Sloppy calling from the other trail.

Ack! This was going to be a long one… 8.25km for me. Lovely trails, a good set that kept a sizeable bunch together for most of the run. Definitely a runners run which will have done my fitness some good. It took a while for me to recover after – thanks!

I was nervous arriving at the runsite – I wasn’t feeling too strong, and there was a mini-ballbreaker in store… I am lacking fitness, and tired. Take it steady and you’ll be fine, I kept thinking to myself. Runsite, and no water… Turkey on his way we heard, but I needed more water. I went to the nearest shop to get some waters, and I definitely need to get a camelpak for the future. I bought 6 bottles, but all vanished quickly. Finally the hash water arrived as we were about to set off. I hadn’t prepared myself properly, all my fault.

I walked off at the start with Chuckie. When Knockout passed us, we debated whether to run along behind her, or to save our energy – definitely some utility theory came into play, but we carried on walking. All the way to the first check, and for now my idea of checking was circle guarding. First circle I finally picked a way to start to walk, but picked the wrong one, and was already behind. I broke into a jog to catch up. At the next check, I was the one who crawled under the barbed wire, just to find the old trails were overgrown and impassable. Chances were we’d be sticking to lower ground for a while, and when it was called, it was clear everyone had short cut as we should have gone to the right – with a collective pact with continued forwards – this is a ball breaker and if we can pinch a bit off the hares, surely it is in the collective good?

Then we started up the hill and straddled the hill. I slotted into mid pack to avoid the exertion of checking. A check took us up the hill, to another circle. The pack had spread out up the hill, ignoring the trail to the right that went down. Piggy opted for it, and it looked good to me. So good when I spotted something white way down the hill. Graven spotted it too, almost too vocally, but held himself back, as the 3 of us ran down while the like of Brownie were still climbing. There was paper, and it was our paper, time to call! And we were descending quickly. At the bottom there was a lake, and my brain was running different options, but decided it had to be the lake above 700 year stadium. Somehow I got to a circle check 2nd… This was going against strategy – Now I kind of had to do some checking… Fortunately Piggy had chosen the wrong way, so I got to check out the trail I would have picked anyway.

The checks were coming thick and fast – the way I like it. I was right, and with HRA behind I nailed a couple more. Damn… This wasn’t my plan at all… I was hot, in front, and still not feeling very good. We came out to the building site, and I missed a sharp turn to the left, but rejoined them in the construction yard. The bastards have cleared trees, so with the sun beating down I climbed up the hill. 100m? perhaps a bit more? Nothing. Shit, this isn’t good. I ran back down, still nobody calling. Perhaps it was all the way down past that noisy digger? Finally I saw people running across the construction yard, and tried to follow suit. I joined Crap Thai, but it wasn’t feeling good, and he took off. We got to the trail towards HTT and I could just about hear them ahead of me. I caught them at the corner where the waterfall trail goes up, up, up….

I paused… Where could the beerstop be? I wasn’t worried about the beer, I just wanted some water… Could they go all the way to HTT and back? or perhaps back to 700 year stadium? Looked and my watch, and we were 5k in, nearly an hour… I was thirsty, and I’ve been up that trail before. I know where it goes. I decided I would try to find the hares, rather than risk climbing the hill without drinks. I went along the trail a bit to see if they were heading to HTT, but no sign of paper, so I turned back to 700 year stadium. Someone else should write up the rest of the run – it was a ball breaker, and my balls were broken. I wasn’t alone… – as ball breakers go, this one certainly broke some balls.

Brown Finger was defeated – just minutes from the summit, he turned back (with Taste My Buns), and came back along the road. Search Parties were sent out for runners on both the long and the short run. One by one hashers descended from the mountain. Chuckie came in looking exhausted – deciding not to drink through exhaustion. Finally Crap Thai was found… and after he was found his torch could be used to find Cuckold. It is early into the season, but congrats Poo – you managed to break a lot of balls – and do so without killing anyone!

Mr. Poo has been on the hareline for months, setting a special mini-ball breaker…. months back he chose the area around Huay Tung Thao, and immediately a bunch of hashers agreed it was a good idea and set runs there… So he moved his mini ball breaker, and rescouted it… So Wooly Jumper figured she would choose Mr. Poo’s wife as her co-hare and set a run so close to his run area. Good luck next week Khun Poo!

The hare brief told us that there would be powder after the first circle check, but no powder after that…. So anyone who drove in would know that the powder led across the dam as we’d driven in. I set off and Brown Finger (great to have you back bud!) slipped in behind me, as we raced across the dam – first km 5:10. I can’t keep that shit up! Then we hit the hill… And Brownfinger (along with Chuckie) filed in behind me… We were climbing a serious hill, and Brownfinger and Chuckie were just chatting away catching up behind me – they asked me questions, but I was barely able to breathe let alone keep climbing.

Very few checks early on, so I guess the pack was spread out. Brownfinger followed me through a couple and promised to check next time. Another circle and I check straight while Brownie & CW checked down the hill. Silence… I got to 100m or so, and there was no sounds from below… Then I spied some paper – a precise square of paper ahead. I headed towards it, and heard CW calling OnOn from below. There must be some mistake – the paper I found was clearly marked as the halloween run. There were no trails leading to it, it has to be the right trail – around the right distance… I called OnOn, but with silence behind, I followed the well marked trail up the hill. A long way up the hill – trail well marked with halloween markers.. I can’t be mistaken – the trail was marked with unique markings and it went up, up, up! Until…. nothing…. not even a circle check?! Presumably we would loop around and get to where Chuckie had called from? I would be the hero! I would be the only one to do the real trail! I guessed “someone” had removed the circle check? And started to check…

Time to cut a long story short… I was alone… The hares had screwed up… But they had the good fortune that everyone (except me) followed their real trail back down the hill…. I got some extra exercise and managed to catch the back runners as I came down the hill… I also got more familiar with some of the trails around where Mr. Poo is setting his mini-BB next week!