Category Archives: CSH3 – Write Ups

It’s been a while! I finally decided to head out to run with the CSH3 – the AGFU with a new incoming committee. I joined in the run, and then headed off. Gigalo Joe was straight into running, so I figured I’d follow suit. Poor bugger got screwed at the first check, and I was on my own ahead, well at least until the next check when I spotted Frozen stood a bit up the hill, and begrudgingly admitted he was on. Another check nailed.

The next check was a bit trickier – or rather it shouldn’t have been. Frozen just ignored it, while I spotted it down the hill a bit and tried following Frozen to no paper. I should have just gone to the check and followed the obvious trail next to it. That’s what Cool Balls did, and shortly after I was scampering along behind him. Gigalo Joe caught up again after the wimp rambo split and the trail took us up hill – a nice trail, just climbing and it was Foooking hot!

At the saddle, I sidestepped GJ and picked the trail heading more to the right, while he wanted the one to the left. Both were heading down the otherside of the hill, and honestly it was 50/50, but I just had a gut feeling about where the run was headed, and luckily my gut was correct! From there I nailed check after check, (to be fair they weren’t too hard to pick), and the voices faded behind as I ran along pleasant trails in the valley behind. All the time I was looking at the hill to my right that either we would have to go back over, or around the end – I was just hoping it was around the end.

At one point the trail was elaborately marked over some barbed wire, down a bit and into some dodgy ass little hut that who can imagine what horrors took place in. Today it was just a circle check, and I was happy to retreat back out and continue along the main trail.

A bit further along I finally got a check a bit wrong – knowing we needed to turn right at some point, this looked a bit more promising, but no joy. I was still ahead, but this time when I called ONON, I could just hear faint sounds of people behind. Man it was hot. The next check was a bastard – well over 100m. I got it right, but aborted and traversed to the left before I got to the paper. That was a deadend, so I was just making my way back when Just Cuming called the ONON – along with some expletives about it being a long check. I fortunately cut in ahead of him and continued.

The pack were on my tail though and the heat was having an effect. We hit the road, and the easiest option would be to just run back down the road to the car and safety of air con. I tried to accelerate, but then a circle. I wanted to keep going down the road, but I knew Sloppy wouldn’t do that, so it had to be off the road, so a little bit of scramble/shiggy over to some guys elaborate tomb. Now Turkey was breathing down my neck, and passing me, with Piggy & Just Cumming.

OK, I was hot, and tired. A couple of months off running and I’ve lost some speed and stamina. Another check, straight on again, but now Turkey was crushing it. Another check, and I thought we’d just passed a trail, but behind me was Willy Walls and Skiddy, so I just idled for a while waiting for someone to call it. Nobody did, and apparently nobody had checked the trail we’d just passed, so I went back and sure enough found some paper.

I’d got nearly 7k at this point, so surely just one last push and it would be over? One check I went straight to paper, so back over the road and another check. A 50/50 – right or left? I went left, and checked to around 120m (there had been a long check before). No sounds from anywhere else, but I suspect people were still regrouping after the back check. I spotted some white paper a bit ahead, so carried on to investigate. A kicked out circle… Definitely too far away to be trail, and why was it kicked out? It had to be the wimp trail, damnit! Then I spotted hashers to the right, ok whatever – I’ll rejoin them by the OnIn.

Good run, but someone should turn down the thermostat. I guess that is the job for the new GM! Good luck!

Hmmm… So maybe people wonder why I haven’t been going to the CSH3 for a while – and I still don’t, because unfortunately for years it has just been shit. Ever since Superman took over it has gone downhill, and it hasn’t recovered.

So why this post? I have heard that Superman decided to give an erect penis award to a nine year old boy last week. If there isn’t a time for a wake up call, what does it take? I am not happy hosting this site about events like this. This hash needs a complete regime change in April and the dinosaurs have to retire, otherwise the hash will die.

Who would hve though it? Decent ir in Mrch?

OK, before I crry on – I hould point out tht the ” nd ” key on my keybord ren’t working, nd I cn’t be red copying nd pting for the ke of write up. You cn figure it out if you wnt, or not bother if you don’t – I don’t relly cre!

new runite jut long from regulr one. o we were quickly on regulr tril. Up towrd lt mn tnding tril tht hed towrd Doi Pui. fter couple of check we followed the blue pipe up, nd when we hit the min tril there w Wimp Rmbo option. Th Rmbo heding further up, o I decided to l hed bck down.

By Alice
—

Sinbad and Chatterbox set an intriguing run out at BanPong,SKP, utilizing the area’s best features and ignoring most of their Vater’s advice as the run was a resounding success.

Chatterbox admitted to 5% creative control and SinBin 1000%. What this tells you is that Skiddy probably regrets hiring Rooter as Dana’s maths tutor.

The kids took
centre stage at the hare brief and Blows yelled for Hash Hush at 110 dB. Soon we were off and onto familiar trails but this time markings were good and the first checks didn’t send the pack onto the In trail, Belly and Skiddy please note.
We wiggled around and then climbed up the spillway and over the bridge to the dam. Obscene took over as circle guard. Public spiritedness or rank laziness? The jury is out.

Trail went down and then right along the road and into the forest. Here I was sure we’d be now doing an anti clockwise loop and after confusion at a forest circle with Pussy W striding back from the correct way and OnOn called behind him by perhaps Scooby Do’s new squeeze, all hell
broke lose with OnOn called by those OFF trail confusing everyone. Cartoon resting 50m up the hill and not shouting Checking but RU? to save himself checking properly was noticed.

Bodies blundered thru’ the forest so I bashed back to the original path and found powder about 2 giant PW strides from where he’d turned. I nailed the next circle, the short order V and almost the following circle. Here the pack caught me as I retraced steps and Just Coming found trail through the ravine and out the other side. Most of the way home was good running and a great circle to follow in the amphitheater of the BanPong lodge. Another CHS3 circle that felt and (looked) like CH4.
Wings for Alice from Chatterbox for being ‘always polite and positive’ and Blows Herself from SinBin for ‘bein a good runner and a good woman!’. What is that boy after ffs?
Onon

Lovely running trails

By Alice
—

Superman and his tribe hared a decent 6.6km trail out in the wilds past Prem School for CSH3 1500.

Trail started on fresh concrete and continued on fresh concrete for longer than the pack would forget. Once we got off into the green it was a lovely trail, farms, orchards and a few wide paths. My old hashmate Shut the Chuck Up from Saudi days turned up to add hair, beard and a fantastic Khobar Hash happi coat to proceedings.

Belly was off like a race horse and kept going for far longer than Anything is probably used to. Sloppy and KO with her mate Slow Gin seemed to disappear into the distance and Skiddy with SinBin shook a leg too.

W/R split after a Km and I moseyed along with STCU chatting and exchanging news.
Suddenly there were walkers infront and I realized we’d merged again. By the excellent 1500 On On we had Jersey Steamer for company too coming from a strange direction.

Celebration 1500 t-shirts were a tad smaller than usual Thai sizes but thanks to SM and SB for sponsoring – and HRA for artwork I’m guessing.

Usual circle nonsense – with Shagless and Cartoon the pick of the charges. I cleared off on my bike before the end as I was getting restless. I wish people would stand closer to the ice and not chatter loudly during the circle.

Onon CSH3 and well set Sups and crew. Strangely enough my odometer read 15000 when I left the A site. Cue Twilight Zone theme music.

The Sloppy Rod called me in the morning to ask where we would go to run today, and we both agreed that sometimes Turkey sets good trails, and given the runsite (near Canal Road Football Field) he couldn’t go far wrong….

A fairly big turnout, and nice to see Crazy Crack & Ravenous again – along with a rather exhibitionist smoking friend. We set off on familiar trails and immediately there was a sharp right towards a “mostly deadend” – the resulting FT just meant all the FRBs were stuck behind the rest of the pack along a single trail.

After a while we were able to run, and promptly hit another false trail and a few more checks as we made our way along the bottom of the hill. Then we started the climb – I was surprised why a few hashers ran past me up the wide road, only to then walk ahead of me down the single track, but it was ok – obviously a hill was coming and I needed to pace myself. Up ahead the checks were pretty much straight on, and CW was leading the way with Doesn’t Get It putting in a fine performance!

Near the top, I caught up a bit as Crazy Crack was telling everyone that the left had already been checked… – I didn’t believe it, and sure enough found paper and was ahead for once, with Sloppy and Doesn’t Get It traversing to catch me. Finally at the peak we turned left ready for the descent, which was a little treacherous, and I took my time, while CW flew past racing with Sloppy.

I followed down the hill, and it seemed they were skipping along holding hand at the checks as they weren’t helping the chasing pack. We came out onto the road and I spied them running together having checked the wrong way – they weren’t holding hands… I hit the road maybe 30-40m behind them, but they were on a mission and started pulling away, while behind me the pack drifted further back. Finally trail led off to the left – an absolute 100% false trail! Sure enough, I rounded the corner back on paper, and the pair of them tried to catch me as we continued onin down the road.

The checks could have been trickier, but the route was nice!

I don’t think the GM likes us… Today was one of the hottest days – not a cloud in the sky, I’d dread to think what it must have been like for him setting it during the day! 😮

Given the runsite, it was unlikely to be flat – JC came to apologise to me before anything else! I remember Big Top setting a run from here – or rather attempting to set a run, and having all kinds of problems… A ball breaker some years ago was from the same place as well… It would take some skill to put together something decent! Sloppy was confident JC would pull it off.

We set off up the road… – maybe a km of tarmac, with the emphasis on “UP”. It was all up… The first check, everyone went right, and left me, CW & Sloppy ambling slowing along the road, chatting and waiting to be called back. But there was paper, and I found myself leading the way up the road. Not long later I found myself following Skiddy up a steeeeeeeep hill with the sun pounding down on my back.

It improved slightly when we entered the tree line, but the hill was hardly started. I trudged on, praying it would soon be over, but it was relentless. On top, there was some decent trails, and I imagined running them, but sadly my legs were jelly by the time we got there. There was some good views, and some agility required to navigate a pipe rather than a trail, and when it came to the downhill bit, it was over far too fast.

That must have taken a lot of effort to put together!

Sloppy called me this morning and suggested there might be some nice trails around where Skiddy was going to set the run – there might be, maybe one day we will find out! The directions to the runsite deserve an award for the most complex ever – I’ve driven past this spot on the way to one of my preferred spots, so ignored the directions and went my own way.

The hare brief wasn’t. But finally we got off and ran down the “runway” from the air adventures center. It was out into the ricefields – fortunately out of season, but it meant the first km or so was pretty miserable scrambling along. Through an orchard and out onto the road. Luckily it wasn’t thaaat hot, and my fitness seemed comparable to the pack. We went past a deserted hotel, that once I was considering using for a halloween run. For a while we were on what seemed like the abandoned roads of a potential moobaan.

A bit too much tarmac, but I somehow got to the front where a check was clearly missing, and here Turkish led CW astray and I managed to stay ahead for a while. That was until getting a check very badly wrong, and instantly the pack was together and looking confused at a busy crowded market – we could have been in the city!

A bit more road, and then back across the paddies – on a nicer trail this time. CW was way ahead the other side of the field, but I made my best efforts alongside Turkish. A good 7.5km of exercise that my body desperately needs.

By Alice
—

Frozen Dick was kvetching that he isn’t able to solve checks with the FRBs. Well Frozen you missed your big chance. This was a ZINGER with FRBs, mid pack, DFLs all milling about checking here and there TOGETHER for about 30 minutes at the second check. Which turned out to be the last check on the wimp trail. It wasn’t much fun. Walkers mostly standing in the shade as every avenue was explored and re-explored further and further to no avail.

Shagless appeared and yelled:The hare said it was to the right. But we were at the WRONG 2nd/last check not the first. Total fcuk up. We checked every which right, front, back and even the other right.
Eventually saw bodies in the woods: Snail trail, Chatterbox, ABB, Shagless. They’d found the 2nd LAST check going the wrong way and dropped paper going further into the woods. There was only a couple of strips to be found. Then nothing. Total fcuk up.

I jogged back to the resort. 3.9km of total fuck up in 35 minutes. Cartoon and Blows tried to follow paper into the woods. Wrong move. They were back shortly afterwards.
I plopped in the pool.

Recommendations:
1. Newly returning hares to be paired with experienced local hares on their first run back.
2. Social services to be alerted if Skidmarks takes virgin hare Potato Head again to ‘teach’ him how to set trail.
3. Cuckold to be informed his Mae Jo endless run has possibly lost its place on the roll of honour.
4. 3 strips per 100m of trail minimum to become legal requirement. Punishable with water down downs or ice time equivalent to time wasted looking while on trail.
5. Prayer.

The pollution dipped a little, so I decided to head out to the CSH3 under the new GMship of Just Cuming. Fucking Hell it is hot out there! Ban Pong resort – a nice spot to run from, and it was Skiddy’s return haring – what would he bring back from his experiences in Canada?

The hare brief was nearly longer than the run! The hare explained a new Hook check – not sure that will be popular, but hey! Finally we were off, and KO and I strolled along the lane discussing the “new” check – I’d seen it before in UK, and didn’t really have fond memories of it. Anyway, we got to a circle, and I loped off to the left while KO went to the right. It was hot, and I was reluctant to put too much effort in. TMB, Sloppy and some others scattered in the same general direction as me, and then we all spotted paper a bit to the left. There wasn’t much paper, but it did have today’s run number on it, and with a little bit of effort we found another circle.

Here TMB went to the right – which kinda made sense. I went left and just around the corner found paper! Not much paper, but that seemed to be the MO today. 50m further and then “ONIN”! WTF? Paper leading back down the road to the resort, and another couple of large ONINs to bring us in the back entrance!

7 minutes after setting off, I ran down the carpark to an incredulous Skiddy! I assured him I hadn’t done the Wimp Trail – I hadn’t even seen a Wimp Trail! A short diagnosis showed we had gone wrong at the first check, as the Wimp Trail was too close.

Sloppy and Tasty joined me as we headed out again – it was just like Saturdays for the past year with just the 3 of us out there! It seems the rest of the pack mostly aborted and went to look at the lake instead. Meanwhile we went back to the first check, and after a concerted effort we found the trail off it – past some cows, that was probably a lot trickier than the hare expected.

Eitherway we were off, and the three of us headed into the valley. A V-check – but no trail marked off it – the bizarre marking kept holding Tasty up, and Sloppy and I plodded along behind her admiring our beerguts. Tasty came running back when she saw the confusing “Hook” check – it looked like a U-turn, so that’s what she did! When we got closer there was the number 4…. Hmmmmz… there were only 3 of us. One option would be to wait for someone else to show up? Or run all the way back to the resort to drag someone out to join us? Or to simply ignore it and carry on – ultimately when you see the U-turn, you don’t U-turn, you just keep going?!

Another circle, and when Tasty had gone 120m, she turned back and saw paper next to me at around 100m – it was another check – (circle to circle?). Previously we’ve been up the hill straight on, but that path looked overgrown, while a newer trail appeared to lead off to the left. Once again we found a little bit of paper, and it dropped us down into the creek bed, and gave us a good 500-700m of rough shitty scramble to get out. Knowing the area, Tasty and I climbed up to the marginally nicer trail above the creek bed, and made out way down again. In the past year we’ve regularly met out in this area, and have networked the trails exhaustively, so there were few surprises left.

Tasty got a bit of a lead, and sat waiting for us at a nice picnic table as the two fat blokes were suffering in the heat. It was enough – time to head in for a beer. As fuckups go, it was memorably monumental!