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14th April – CH4 – Graven Image

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With Songkran still in full swing, it wasn’t clear how many would manage to get to the runsite – even though Graven had chosen one close to the town at the Boy Scout Camp. As it happened there was a reasonable turnout, with a few visitors appearing from the US. Graven told us how Angry (his cohare) had managed to short cut the run set, and what could have been 6km was now 3km. Whatever – it was hot as hell.

I set off with Chuckie & HRA and straight away the trail went up. It’s kind of difficult to set a flat run at the boy scout camp, nestled at the base of Doi Suthep, but fortunately the hares weren’t going to be too evil. At the 2nd check, most carried on up the hill checking, while I headed along the flat and down a little slope. I was on, but it took me forever to find the powder. Dumbass.

Then came the “Skiddy Sticks”. Some miscommunication between the two hares had the sticks at a small tunnel, with the trail continuing from about 5 metres further on. NOT back, as expected with Skiddy Sticks, but further along the trail… Confusion ruled, with CW running backwards and forwards along a partially built aqueduct (spelt it right this time!) Square Rooter had a sit down to get his head straight.

Back down a waterfall with a last little climb back over the ridge and we were home. Not too bad, just the right length, and it ate the time up with the way we screwed it up.

13th April – CSH3 – Mr. Poo

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It’s Songkran! The hashes of Chiang Mai collaborated for the CSH3 to set the Songkran run and a large group descended onto the Hash Pub before the start of the run. With extra visitors, the hares would have to run ahead to procure more beer – ah well! At the appointed hour we set off along the usual route past the Imperial Mae Ping Hotel.

The first V check had us duck around the back of a Chedi, but only I did it, with Belly Dancer leading the pack along to Loi Kroh and out into the water fight. Past the entrance to CEC and we were already drenched, with Graven joining me as we ducked into the back alleys – he had a thirst on! But at the next circle, I lucked out and found the right way onto Thapae Road and to Interbar for the first round of beers.

Back out onto the streets, but from here it was easy – off to Euro Diner for a beer (or 2), around to Next Place for a beer (or 3) and finally back along Loi Kroh to the carpark outside Poo’s place for the circle. Not the easiest circle, with noisy music blaring all around, and a group of saturated and drunken idiots around, so we kept it short, or rather we tried to keep it short…

8th April – CH3 – Graven Image

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Was it Graven Image or Skid Mark? Apparently GI set most of the trail – making it up as he went along – but it was clearly a Skid Mark ending with the On-In the wrong side of the river Ping to the cars. We had been warned it was a trademark “Ping River Run”.

Back track a bit. I’m a bit hash weary these days, so was reluctant to make an appearance, but after chatting to Chuckie in the afternoon decided to go along and hope there wouldn’t be any more male hash dramas. The directions were complicated, and with little in the way of signage it was amazing that a large group found the A site.

After a hare brief we were taken by Songthaew to the B, from which we set off into orchards – seemingly in the wrong direction away from the river. A few early checks kept us confused as we weaved through orchards. One check at a road had CW and I checking left and Angry checking right – we arced around until we heard the call from somewhere off to the right. Cutting across had us the wrong side of a river and as we made our way along, we found the powder. Did we short cut? Or was it superior hashing? Either way we could see powder both sides of a canal, and tracked back along the trail till we came to Angry Inch coming the other way. Not long after we found Superman and Belly Dancer who had short cut!

It was here that the trail turned inevitably towards the river and the next few checks had us strung out by the time we got to the beer stop. The virgin, a relative newby and Shagless nowhere to be seen as we continued over to the river bank with Skiddy dashing back to take photos. CW was first to reach the river bank, but as he’d seen the On-In he opted for the 2.5km alternative up to the nearest bridge. Angry & I saw our chance and dived in to paddle across to the cold waiting beers.

Good fun circle!

6th April – CSH3 – HRA

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With heads suffering from Animal Dinner excesses, there was a small fragile group assembled at Huay Tung Thao in the hope that HRA would be gentle with us. He’d been drinking heavily the day before, so surely he wouldn’t have had the energy for anything too taxing?

Graven & Angry were lively, having missed out on the previous evening, and Angry set the early running as we weaved nicely along some flat trails at the edge of the lake. Along to the guard house, and a set of skiddy sticks. I was already losing the pace and the trail turned abruptly up the waterfall… I stood and contemplated for a while, as it is a long way up, with little choices for where to come down.

What the hell, I didn’t want beer yet anyway, so I started climbing, and climbing, and climbing… Scrambling over fallen trees up into the heavens. YOU BASTARD HRA! I hate hills even more so when hungover, and this was just not fun. Finally it leveled out and for a while at least I could run downhill passing Mind Your Nuts, Humperdick and I Got Gas. Chuck Wao was probably in the worst state – he went for a stroll with Square Rooter!

The circle was a quiet affair with little energy! Damn the Animal Dinner!

2nd April – Horny Monkey

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So what would the soon to be departing to the US for 6 months have up his sleeve for his swan song run? Would he at last set a good run … a better than usual run would have been welcome … the run directions to near the 700 year stadium seemed promising!

 

On No! … Yep HM found a moo baan we hadn’t run round before! Holy Crap indeed! 12 of us showed up for this thriller …

 

After a ludicrous hare brief with bizarre concoctions for False Trail, powder, invisible old leaf yellow paper and powder we  set off out towards the highway (107) – Angry Inch, Semen Soars and Humperdick raced Belly Dancer to the  V-check at the moo baan gate – BD went left and everyone else went right – both there FT! Back BD ran to the A and spotted Horny heading out through a hole in the fence – with a heads up BD headed out into the cow infested field while the pack ran back around the wall to give chase. Fortunately BD overheard Horny telling Square Rooter about a red marker which can in handy when BD found the Skiddy Stix. Under the wall by the red marker was Horny’s idea of fun … still we were all bunched together.

 

More running around the streets of the moo baan with the bemused Thai’s confirming their suspicions that farangs are mad. At the edge of the moo baan the bulk of the pack mistook the trail and was some confusion about where the true trail was heading. Semen Soars despite grumbling like a Dutchman found the proper trail (yes more moo baan running) and Semen, Belly and Angry Inch tracked round until bumping into the main pack running the wrong way. Finally the trail was found and a small scramble up a sandy cliff face took us to some nice running trails!!

 

Dog Shit & BD decided that excessive desire to be FRB on a run like this was ill advised, so with shouts from Chuck Wao, Skid Mark, Humperdick – our ‘intelligent hashing’ paid off and Horny had yet again laid some tricky back checks a plenty, Alice was none to happy with the amount of rocks … but that did beat concrete. Mind Your Nuts took it easy and Graven Image was in super stealth mode for his 101st run!

 

Doggy and Belly arrived at the jungle juice stop to find Horny grinning ear to ear with delight but Skiddy was bleeding profusely from his finger that he had lacerated on a leaf. With FRB’s sent off – Horny told us his plan to finish setting the run – upon hearing this we decided we needed more jungle juice and since we could see the moo baan … GPS our way back to A.

 

Yep – its was another terrible Horny Monkey run of 6.5km for those that did it all. The pack came in pretty close together and to be fair … it was perhaps one Horny’s better moo baan runs!

 

Graven Image got the Wings and his 100th Run mug – Congralations Gravy – well deserved. The circle had the odd ‘moment’ at times but it was fun on the whole. Then OnOnOn into town for some Monkey-ing around.

 

Thank you very much Horny Monkey for your efforts with CH3 and hope you have a good trip back to the US of A. See you in September.

 

OnOn

Belly Dancer

31st March – CH4 – Humperdick

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Humpers took us to Ob Khan for the happy hash – a runsite quite familiar being the same A bucket as the 400th run. A reasonable turnout despite the Bunnies being the same day.

We were pointed out up a short rise to an early circle check. Only Angry Inch was interested in running – and he promptly got it wrong. I was feeling tired and lazy, and had little intention of putting too much into it, hoping I could stay with the FRBs for a while – except I kept hitting the checks. Thats great until a check is Skiddy sticks.

Nonetheless I led the way down and into some deathly canyons. Being at least vaguely familiar with the area, I didn’t expect him to take us into the depths of the canyons, as there was little way out. So, Alice took over towards the front, winding deeper and deeper into them. Finally I started climbing up a spine between 2 canyons, with virgin Brad, Graven Image and Human Excrement leading others up behind us. It turned out that was a good call, as it avoided an “unavoidable” climb for the rest. We went further, arcing around a ridge back to the trail, but still got to the descent first.

Graven led the way down, and by the time we saw Humps taking photos at the bottom, my legs were shot. Another ridge took it out of me, and gradually I lost the pace. A nice interesting set though, with an interesting canyon variation.

30th March – CSH3 – Big Top

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Big Top dragged us 27km out of town past San Kampaeng, near the hot springs in Mae On. Not quite an outstation, but a bloody long drive! She’d teamed up with Push Back for the run, and the pair were both looking smug when they showed up brandishing beers. Evil Big Top? With steep cliffs all around us, what on earth would they come up with?

We were pointed off back down the road and told to look to the right. I jogged off, and had a deja vu from when Chuckie and I had jogged off 5km before realising we had missed the trail. This time we found the trail and Angry Inch was behind me as we cut off into some farmers fields. At every opportunity the hares had us crawling through different barbed wire fences, over, under, through, between, it was like some sadistic army assault course.

Having gone down the hill at the start, it was inevitable that we’d have to climb back up again later, and sure enough when the uphill came, CW hit the front and one by one everyone dropped back. Finally we came across Big Top stood in a field still brandishing the beer. We were close to home – right? It was just there under the monstrous cliff? Except Push Back was there to point us off for another loop – a kind of impromptu Wimp Rambo split. Even Leaky Faucet and the newly named “Crack and Feel” did the extra km, but I was struggling by then.

Fun cirtcle and then off to a great steak house for the ononon…

25th March, CH3, Byte My Yahoo

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So what to expect from Cuddly Ken – Chiang Mai’s most innocent and alluring male Hasher (as well as most intelligent) … hummm … he hates hills, to date has set great running trails and is dab hand at the BBQ.

With a little telegraphing he’d be setting a slightly longer run – after both CSH3 and CH4 both >7km affairs – there was a certain degree of trepidation about what BmY had in store for us. None of this was eased when arriving at the A bucket – with him going on about how he’d set the run at 6AM and had been rehydrating on beer ever since – he even quipped to Belly Dancer that he had some doubt if BD would even make it back – I began to think there might be a muaahh aspect to this run.

The hare brief was absurdly short – just circle checks – and off out we were sent down a dirt road and it was 800m before the first circle check appeared – those who’d attempted None of Your Business’s storm truncated CH4 run had some advantage and soon found trail – and this continued with copious checks keeping us all together until the ‘hill’!

Hill – WTF – this is BmY – who professes to hate hills, and no small hill at that – up and up the bastard went and apart from the specially invited FRB In and Out – who checked like a demon all over the place and still ran up the mountain – the weary pack ground their way up BmY’s hellish rock strewn trail.

At the ‘top’ of course there was a check and the pack was all over the place looking for the trail – Kwazi Moto declared no more hills for him and vanished somewhere, leaving BD with Square Rooter and Dog Shit. Of course they sailed down the hill – rather rock strewn death trap – and fortunately Square Rooter held back long enough to indicate where the trail headed (right) – Doggy vanished – perhaps he found the real (nice & safe) trail Humprdick had found but the circle check had been kicked out straight down the 27’ slope!

Way down nearing the bottom of the slope of death – HRA appeared with Angry Inch who’d lost his GPS in an earlier tumble, and HRA valiantly assisted BD down the most evil part of the hill. Into the gully and putting a little cantor on with HRA – we got back in touch with Square Rooter and Semen Soars and later on Fishy Finger too. Up the slope Horny Monkey was commanding everyone to stick together which was much appreciated.

At last into what we were expecting from a BmY run – the more familiar dirt trails and with some disgust – black top/concrete road which had checks a plenty.

At the point where we came to the quarry we were all very close together – Humperdick appearing from left field after checking behind a wall for 400m – with a glance a GPS showing ~1km to the A bucket and the sun well and truly set – HRA again kindly stick with me and a ghostly Graven Image came up on our rear as BmY’s final evil twist of a stinking stream had to be navigated before the final jog in along 800m of filthy dirt road.

Amazingly BmY achieved the rare feat of getting the whole pack in (ex a short cutting Kwazi) with ~ 10 minutes of each other. In and Out and Graven Image had ~10km on their GPS and I had 7.4km.

A tough run – a bit bigger postage stamps would have helped on the confidence of not getting lost in the dark – but a well set run. BmY did deliver on expectations in the BBQ department – I don’t believe he made the burgers but thanks for a good feed and Horny led an entertaining circle.

OnOn
BD

24th March – CH4 – Human Excrement

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Human Ex teamed up with Frozen Dick out in ‘my’ area past Doi Saket. It was Frozen’s birthday run, and the free t-shirts are always appreciated! A slightly different A-site, and the hares were busy trying to feed false information out to us.

We set off through the field that FD had used on a Saturday recently – interesting that he’d chosen a different A-site, but as I jogged along I remembered Skiddy’s faceplant. It had to go left and into the hills, where FD is proud of having found some ‘new’ trails. As we cut up the hill, there was perhaps a trail, but quickly we were into the shiggy, clambering over rocks on a steep ascent. I lucked out at the first set of ‘hybrid skiddy check’, but with the previous days run in my legs, I did all I could just to keep going.

Sure enough we scrambled our way across to the great running trail in the valley behind, and Graven took off with Angry Inch. They could pick up the 2nd powder bottle, but when we set off back over the hill, I was done… My legs were really struggling, but I caught up with the pack as they searched a very tricky check just over the ridge. Turns out it went back, right and up. It took Graven an age to find it, and by the time he did, most of us had bailed, with only Square Rooter to follow him.

Humperdick & HRA set off in search of their partners, who were already sitting at the songthaew. The rest of us started appearing from all directions, bailing with GPS assists.

23rd March – CSH3 – Graven Image

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Graven teamed up with Fishy Fingers to set out at the tiger’s head – one of my favourite places to run. I had high hopes and high expectations! With the buses arriving right at run time we were a little delayed waiting for the virgins to pay and finally we set off through the assault courses to the trails behind the hill.

I found myself jogging along early with an energetic virgin called Suzanne – who was a good runner and kept her pace throughout. Sadly we weren’t on paper and had to cut back to the trail that was going up. I’d promised Leaky Faucet that it would be a flat run, but the early parts weren’t! We got to the check at the 5 way intersection, and when I picked it right, I thought I was away at the front – only Skiddy appeared from ahead and the lead rotated to Sloppy Rod.

Good checks had us rotating all the way through, as it took a while before I was confident we were heading around to the left. The pace was quick but there was a good group at the front with the 2 virgins, Sloppy, Skiddy and myself – with Angry Inch cutting corners to keep up.

After about 7km, we hit the finale – a new rope bridge that took about 3 minutes per person to climb across while the hare was placed with camera to capture the moments. I took a necessary nap after the crossing, and joined up with Horny for the last pass over the hill to the A bucket. They’d taken us up to do the rappel down the rope, with co-hare capturing that moment. I bailed and came up the road.

Enjoyed the circle, enjoyed the run, enjoyed the OnOnOn.