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31st July – CH4 – Cumalot

Posted on August 1, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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Whoa!!!! Square Rooter would have loved this one! We set off from the back of the Ag Centre, and from there, there was only one way to go… – Up!

I set off along the familiar trail behind the wall, and knowing where the first check would be pondered whether to go right into the orchard, or left into the trees. Meanwhile Humps was noticing how HRA had pruned the bamboo trees for us – but only to his head height. I chose left, and was correct. Next junction, I chose right and wasn’t correct. I made it back to the trail in time to see Cabbage Patch take a dive in front of me. We reached the bottom of the hills.

Scrambling around the side of it, Skiddy was leading and we got to a check. Steep up to the left, steep down to the right. Nobody wanted to go right so Taste My Buns looked at Skiddy going up, Chuckie meandered off straight on. I bravely went for the downhill option. When I found the paper, I couldn’t have been happier! It was shortlived though as after a short descent the trail went up, up, up… We probably reached the height of Doi Suthep temple. A relentless slog of climbing with limited checks to entertain us – just enough to keep Chuckie just behind me, and Piggy just a bit further back. The pack was stretching out across the hill. Brutal, brutal, brutal – for a Thursday happy hash as well!

Finally a check, and we broke off down to the right, plummeting off the side of the mountain down a steep trail. A bit lower, a check had me thwarted – I had hoped the hares had shown some more imagination than a straight up and down, but nope, Chuckie called from the trail that headed straight back down. I faintly caught sight of him in the distance at one point, but he and Piggy raced their way On In. Phew… I guess we’ll all be fitter after we recover from that one!

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28th July – CH3 – Ting Tong

Posted on July 29, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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With Skiddy the co hare, and the location being flat Lamyai country to the south of the city, what did we have in store? The first clues came on facebook, where Skiddy announced he had lost yet another phone, and that Ting Tong really was ting tong. Ominous signs!

I wasn’t feeling too good, but I dragged myself to the run site, and with hare brief telling us it would be ‘fun’ with a special surprise for us, we were off (hoping the surprise would be a beer stop!). Turkey led the way through some horrible shiggy, where we just picked our way avoiding the brambles, out onto a little road. Circle check and we split up. When Turkey does call On On he calls with such joy in his voice and we ran over to him to endure some more shiggy. Another check, and we finally broke out onto a wide area of freshly raised land – where the trucks come and dump mud to raise the land above the flood plain – mud is only flattened a bit, so when it gets wet (which it had), it turns into a sludgy pit. Feet were already getting encased in mud. The flood lake to the left we again followed Turkey to the end of the lake, and when he called circle check, we could already see the paper leading us around the other side of the lake – yet more gooey, sludgy, mud to struggle through.

In many ways I get an advantage, paying less attention to the state of my feet that say Chuckie does, so I emerged from the pit of slime just ahead of Turkey. Next circle and he followed me down to check at the road. That was the last I saw of him… I turned back and well, there was a bridge, so we’d probably be using it?! Sure we would! The next section weaved its way through some farms and crossed a road to a circle check at the edge of a rice field. A few steps to the right, and I spotted something white to the left of the rice field – closer investigation and I was on, along the edge. Another circle, with limited options, but to go to the road ahead. More farm, and more roads to cross… Some how I was managing to stay a bit ahead of Pigshit, and Chuckie just a bit further behind.

Finally got to another road, with a circle check. I was slightly torn, but went straight over again, with Piggy right on my tail. He muttered something about making sure I called it as he reluctantly checked another way. I ran it out, and sure enough called at the end when I turned the corner straight into a flooded, muddy field. This would slow them down a bit?! I ran through calling On. Finally some solid ground on a burr, and I could turn and watch Chuckie gingerly pick his way through, while Piggy ploughed on like a kid playing in waves at the beach. One last check, and there was something white flickering across the field. My luck was in, and as I emerged onto the road, I could see the restaurant just along to the right.

So focused on the restaurant, I took the long way around, and missed the shorter route through the gardens. Sadly Piggy didn’t miss it, and sprinted ahead of me calling On In. Nice going.

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26th July – CSH3 – Pigshit

Posted on July 28, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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Pigshit picked another runsite in Maejo – heading towards the Tiger’s Head, but off into a soi on the left. A nice find – I’ve not run from there before, but I had a feeling we’d be crossing over trails that I have run before…

Hare brief over and we were off, and I was quick to get the first check wrong. Back on track and we were weaving left and right, back and forth. A short cutter’s delight! I wasn’t short cutting at that point, but spotted plenty of opportunities. Turkish on the other hand wasn’t going to let a good opportunity to short cut go to waste and promptly appeared ahead of Sloppy. Sloppy’s curses were as loud as his OnOn calls as we finally headed into familiar trails – Until halfway the hare had done a great job of finding some new little loops.

We headed over a little hill and got down to the square lake that I’ve used as an A site a few times. No check – interesting? But Turkey started calling circle check from along one side. Either he was going around the lake, or he was cutting back – I checked over the dam, and could see paper ahead at the other side of the lake. Excellent! But before I could get to it, Turkey was calling On On from the other side of the lake. I investigated the paper, and saw it cut down the side of the hill, and across a field back to the road. Again a short cutter’s paradise. I was ahead, but proceeded to get the next check very badly wrong, and was soon behind Cougar and Crap Thai. Who knows who managed to NOT short cut? Nice run though!

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21st July – CH3 – Chuck Wao

Posted on July 21, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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11km south on canal road – a bit of a trek, but I sloped out of work and headed down to see what he had in mind. The crematorium, and no doubt the familiar trails behind it. A modest crowd assembled, missing some regulars, but swelled by the visiting Cabbage Patch, the returning Head Hacker and soon to be named ‘Pee On Me’. Looking around, I suspected I would need to do some work finding the trail…

We set off and Pee On Me, Skiddy and I arrived at the first circle together. Setting the circle around the corner gave a big hint as to where the On In trail might be, and already my mind was racing ahead on trail. Sure enough, I picked the first check right, and then the 2nd took us along the fence at the side of the temple. Lovely running trails, and I jogged along enjoying it. We had to turn right sooner or later, it was just a case of picking the right trail. Nice, I nailed it, and a long, long stretch for me to open up the legs on. Calls faded behind me – could I keep up my luck?

Finally a circle check on a main ish trail, so I took a moment or two to double check my bearings… It gets very disorienting along those trails at times, so once I knew where I was, I opted for the small trail that isn’t completely obvious – after 100m, I called “On On” into the silence behind me. How long would my luck hold out? A few more checks and I found my self looped back around to the right, climbing through shiggy. From away to the right, a faint call, I called back, but it was fruitless, the rest of the pack were the wrong side of a gully, heading on the loop I’d just done.

Rare do you nail every check in a hash, and sure enough, finally the hare got me at a cross check. It seemed like time to head back, so I picked straight on – check back. From there I could arc up through the shiggy to the other trail, and again, check back. Back to the check leaving one option, so I neatly kicked the check out for the rest of the pack, and headed on. One more circle check had me a bit muddled, but with silence behind, I found trail and headed towards the OnIn.

There was one final F*ck You from the hare, with a dummy false trail off to the left. I picked up the paper and reset it before heading back for a beer. Nice one Chuckie, but I had you pegged! Good circle – I hadn’t planned on staying for it, but hey, hopefully I’ll get on top of things tomorrow…


(No, I didn’t short cut!)

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19th July – CSH3 – HRA Outstation

Posted on July 20, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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HRA and Cumalot teamed up to organise an outstation in Pai, so after 2.5-3 hours drive, I pulled into the resort, just in time to check in and collect hash cash. Hare brief done, we were off on out with Tasty Buns & Romy up front. First check had me going up a hill that wasn’t necessary, and it was a bit of a scramble to cut across back to the pack. The hares took us towards a temple, and teased us with a climb up the hill, before cutting left back down to the flats.

We followed a creek for a while, and only the diligence of Chuckie could keep his feet dry while the rest of us paddled regularly. I was getting quite a few checks right, including the pink false trails. Finally I got a check badly wrong, and it took a while for me to get back in earshot. Turns out had I just continued a few more yards I would have found paper again, but not to worry.

Finally we got to the novel “N/SR” split. Despite the hare brief, we were all wondering if SR was “Short Run”, turned out it was “Super Rambo”! The extra loop consisted of an extra 2km with 2 treacherous river crossings. I spent too long debating the split, and couldn’t catch up again as Piggy ran ahead with the German ladies.

Skiddy ran the circle for the absent GM and it went well with some good highs to see us off to our buffet dinner. The resort clearly hadn’t been visited by hashers before as we proceeded to drink them out of Heineken and then Leo. Finally personal stashes located and devoured we hit the sack.

Next morning, Chuckie treated us to a hangover run – which largely consisted of reusing HRA’s 800m OnIn. The kids loved it, and Willy Walls is becoming a bit of a Racist Bastard – as I ran into the resort, I glanced over my shoulder and eased up as I was homefree, only for WW to sprint past me. 8 Bit led the rest of the kids in.

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17th July – CH4 – Chuck Wao

Posted on July 18, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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The Fire Prevention Centre, close to town, a handy run spot with shelter for the off season. A few virgins swelled our ranks, with Struggles to Cum adding numbers again and again. She showed up late (as usual) along with Can’t Keep (It) Up, just as we were setting off on the run.

I led the way down the hill, and when we passed the first intersection I remarked to Kangaroo, that there would be a false trail ahead and we would be going back to the right. Sure enough, there was the FT and it was back across to the right of the lake. The trails seemed to have changed a bit, but at a V check, I managed to stretch out a bit of a lead. As we hit the road, I nailed a circle check, and then outwitted the hare on another FT. I was out of sight, and out of earshot in the lead.

I ran along the trail at the edge of the Ag Centre, waiting for the moment to cut right up the hill. I did, and there was another circle check. Gutted, I got it wrong, and in no time the pack was back with me. With Tasty Buns taking the lead I ended up with a dumby check up the wrong hill. The OnOn eventually came from down to the right, and it took a long time to rejoin the pack, and when I did, it was just in time to get another check wrong. The early luck had run out. When we hit the waterfall right by the Fire Prevention Centre, again, I got it wrong, but opted to just run on in down the hill.

A good set, somewhat familiar trails, but it managed to thwart me several times. On On.

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14th July – CH3 – Sloppy Rod

Posted on July 14, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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Feeling a bit jetlagged & hungover today, so quite lazy to go hashing, but it was Sloppy Rod, and he is normally a good hare, so I made the effort. Incredibly detailed instructions took us to the reservoir just past the Tiger’s Head, and I was immediately looking forward to the run. Starting from half way along the lake, we had to be hitting the great flat trails at the end of the lake.

Sure enough, once we’d moved vehicles & beer around in circles, we had a hare brief and set off. I set off at a jog, and got a couple of checks right, with calls fading away behind me. Excellent running trails and I stretched out. We dipped off the main trail to follow a creek bed for a bit, but soon climbed back out onto the trail – I should have just stayed on the trail – no one would have known!

Finally we hit a circle, and I was torn – it seemed to be about the right time to turn and I had a feeling we could head back to the right without intercepting trails. So why didn’t I check that way? Instead I continued forwards looping around to the left and finally getting back to the circle as Pigshit arrived with Chuckie. So much for the lead – especially as Piggy picked the last option and got away from me. The late arriving HRA stood at the circle screaming at people as he didn’t seem to realise he had caught up already.

Then I started going backwards through the pack, tired and unfit Chuckie, Piggy, Turkey & HRA took off ahead of me, while Skiddy fell in behind. We sped up when we found Humperdick pruning a bamboo tree in the middle of the trail. He was going backwards for some reason.

Excellent trails throughout, and well marked – cheers hare! Wish I had my GPS so I could look at the route in more detail for future reference!

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12th July – CSH3 – Push Back

Posted on July 12, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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Push Back & Tasty Buns joined together to set their virgin harings and after 2 weeks in UK I was missing the hash and looking forward to a good one! Unfortunately, Chuckie side tracked me with “Coffee” last night, and when jetlag kicked in, I nearly overslept and missed it! Fortunately, I made it out to 11km or so down canal road to see what they had in mind…

A teutonically detailed harebrief set us off with Humps guffawing while Turkey went the wrong way out of the carpark. The first check had us guessing, and everyone guessing wrong. The hares kindly came to point us in the right direction and for a while we were back on track weaving our way through an orchard. A circle check, and we made the first of our mistakes, with trail being found higher up the road, only for us to get to a cross check from the wrong direction. After finding the false trails we promptly found ourselves back at the previous circle check with the hares waving frantically at us. So far we had run quite a bit of the run backwards, but got back on track quickly enough.

I couldn’t get anything right, and the hangover was hampering my effort. More circles, and more confusion. After a circle, we seemed to go cross country for over 100m until we got to the paper that someone was calling from up ahead. It can’t be right, but I was hot and tired. Humps bellowed that we should go back, while the rest of the pack called On On from down the hill. Neither call made much sense in the grand scheme of the run, so Chuckie and I set off in a completely different direction, with Big Top tagging along. Some people call it “Intelligent Hashing”, whatever – we intercepted the trail shortly before the final V check.

NOYB was up front, and looking fit as a fiddle (is a fiddle really fit?). Anyway, I was relieved when he went the wrong way at the last check (even though it had been kicked out), and I jogged along with CW back to the A where somehow Bow Wow and Muskrat were already waiting! Hard to accuse them of short cutting when I think everybody had their own version of the run. Pretty sure that nobody did the run as intended, but it worked very well anyway – 45 minutes! Loaves of bread greeted us next to the wine at the finish.

Humps kicked off the circle, and things were going smoothly until an unexpected storm hit and washed us away. I justifiably got the wings for my 200th run :) from the safety of my car! Then it was off to a great restaurant for dinner. I think we should get Tasty Buns to set the run more often – this was great!

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23rd June – CH3 – Turkish Delight

Posted on June 23, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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Turkey teamed up with I Got Gas to set yet another run from Huay Tung Thao – I’d left the sign there a month back and we’ve used it again and again…. This time we were inside the park, so we’d have to be doing something a little different. We set off away from the lake in the direction of the army base. An early check had Chuckie leading the way up a small hill, and when I got to the top, he lead us down again.

Fortunately I got lucky heading to the right, and then nailed a good check off up to the left. Knowing we were pinned in between the Army base, and the 2nd lake, we had to be heading back to the left. Nobody would be daft enough to head into the army base, especially while there was a coup on, and you could hear gun fire from a training exercise not far away. We exhausted the options to the left of the lake, before Skiddy found paper on the trail that goes nowhere. Clearly unscouted, once we got to the bank of the lake, the hare hacked his way through the shit along the side of the lake until he got to the barbed wire fence, which he duly took us into the base.

We tracked down the road heading towards the barracks, watching out for stray bullets. Until suddenly we ran out of paper… Uhoh… No check, just no paper… I carried along the obvious trail that heads away from the road, and after around 200m or so I finally found paper. Not sure what had happened there – had the run been sabotaged, or had the hares fucked up? Again we headed cross country until eventually hitting some reasonable trails.

I got another couple of checks right, but could hear Piggy not far behind me. Another check, and I gambled on a trail back to the right, but sadly Turkey wasn’t that smart, and had used the obvious straight on one. Time to hustle, and I put my foot down to catch up with Piggy & Chuckie at a barbed wire fence where the trail turned left. They were just along to the left, and called another circle check. Interesting… We weren’t far from home, and there was a hole in the fence – and there on the other side, a nice piece of paper dangling off a leaf! I pointed it out to Skiddy and we set off… “On On” and not long after “On In”. Gotta love hashing! 😉

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21st June – CSH3 – Cool Balls

Posted on June 21, 2014 by admin| Leave a comment
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Some 10km along the Sameong Road, and I was dashing to make it there on time. Just in time to collect the money, which didn’t take long, there were only 17 hashers, including 3 visitors. The lowest turn out I can remember for a CSH3. Not to worry, we would set off to see what Cool Balls had put together.

After the hare brief, he pointed UP. Straight up a mud trail / road that seemed to go on forever. Chuckie and I discussed strategy and were hoping Sloppy Rod & None of Your Business would pull their weight at the checks. One of the visitors also looked like he might be up with us – his name ‘Pleasantly Average’ apparently described his cock, but also fitted his running style – he quickly fell into a circle guarding role.

Anyway, after 500m or so of steady climbing up, we were starting to wonder if we were going to get any checks. We needed a break, and Chuckie needed to tie his shoes. Finally a Cross Check, and of course, I picked wrong. Shortly after a circle, and this time the paper was a LONG, LONG way from the check, with NOYB finally picking it after we’d given up checking along that way. Of course, it was the trail that headed UP again.

We’d gained 100m or so in elevation by this point, so NOYB checked down at the next check, while I scrambled up a steep bank towards a forest line. No OnOn call from anywhere else, but I was giving up hope when finally I spotted paper. I don’t think anyone wanted to follow me, and I heard that some short cut here. We’d gone from 382m elevation at the start to 559m elevation in 1.6km – 180 metres climb! Surely we could start our way down now?

Trail was hard to follow through the trees, and Sloppy caught me up by the next check, and sure enough we started down at last. A confusing check, as ONON calls were echoing around the valley, and the trail zig zagged down through a resort. I was left with the miserable view of Chuckie, Sloppy and NOYB racing off from way below me, and no easy way of getting down to them, without the long zig zags – even Big Top and Square Rooter were ahead!

It was hot, I was sweaty, I was tired… After 41minutes, the trail started going up again – up and in the wrong direction. I thought better of it, and when I crossed a little bridge I found Sloppy checking back towards me. A neat short cut, and shortly after I found the paper, again heading UP a ridge. I knew the trail I’d been on headed around that, so I let Chuckie lead the way up there, and intercepted Sups for some intelligent hashing. Within 30m we were back on paper, and heading back down the hill towards the A.

Finally we hit the main road, but rather than taking us along the road, the hare(s) had put us along the side of a little canal – tricky trail, but much better than the road. Back across the road, and we were close to the finish. An hour’s run. A TOUGH hour’s run. As much as I don’t like hills, this was a great set, and the hare (despite not scouting) had clearly put a lot of effort into it – too bad there wasn’t much support from the hashing community.

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