6th Feb – CH3 – Pigshit

The signage to the A was probably the worst thing about the run, different coloured signs, signs on the right at left turns etc. I mean, on a scale of badness, mmm, possibly .75 – but enough to completely bamboozle HRA, who allegedly hadn’t been drinking, and more critically beer mobster Tiptoe.
The hare brief was brief. Funny! And off we went like rats up a drainpipe. The cream paper managed to curl and look aged after a day. I empathised.
The trail followed a Nov run of mine but in the opposite direction, lovely forest paths, a dry streambed, some bush, farmland, just great. At a check, Charlie was attending a grazed knee while Poo and self clambered under barbed wire in search of paper. Oh, they went thataway, added Charlie helpfully after we’d gone 50m wrong.
Once at the BJ junction, it was right towards the road and perhaps the quarry or…..stay South side and follow my trail from last Mon’s male run! Blimey, talk about deja vu. At least Browny got to smell the bovine anal offerings he treasures. He even ran off trail to sniff the scent. Pervert.
A semi jogging PiPoo and CheapShagger had been left behind by now and I was jogging along in train of Poo and Charlie. Chuck, Graven, Sherman and Suckit were ahead, along with the Namaimo Cannonball but I only heard faint calls and never saw them again. No great loss admittedly.
Up the stony hill and down the other side. Would hares take us back into the doi and around anti clockwise? Yes! Free scouting lesson, apply here. I’m in!
The return loop was excellent trail, narrow forest paths on ridges with tricky Vs and checks descending to more open pastures and wider farm tracks. Charlie let me pass but I couldn’t catch Poo.
A final check had left and right ahead options but jackknifed back left, up and around. Nicely done hares. Pleased I didn’t get there first.
The circle was extra long as Frozen and Tiptoe decided to short cut as Frozen knows the area like the back of his wanking hand. 2 1/2 hours later the love birds return from 180 degrees the wrong way muttering about Shiggy, barbed wire and ravines. Marvellous stuff.
Two splashes stand out: Browny sharing excess amber with HRA last Xmas and then being offered Cumalot to finish him off or something. And most disturbingly the picture painted by Shakespeare’s American son Sucket of Piggee and Strangely in matching lingerie wanking off together on a double bed to Albanian fart porn and deciding their hash paper should be…ugh..ugh..ugh..creeeeeeeaaaaam.
Fcuk my dead dog. That bastard vision can not be unseen. Thanks Suckit for ruining the rest of my life.
Superb set, lovely running trails and the most engaging and sparkling On On On in months. Well, the pack went to Mad Dog while I enjoyed sushi (ahem) in Nimmanhimen with a lonesome Canuck visitor. Sometimes you eat the trail, and sometimes the trail eats you.
Kudos to Square Rootley for his magnificent achievement of 300 male runs, 3 pewter tankards (2 mislaid and new one already half flattened) and putting up with all this CH3 silliness for donkey’s years.
Alice.