By Alice
—
Graven and Anal Vice stand in Angry Inch set a tough outstation run in Pattaya for the vacationers from ChiangMai and an equal number of local hashmen, true and staunch.
The crowd assembled at some Aussie bar and familiar faces from my Pattaya hashes in years
gone by revealed themselves, even if I couldn’t recall many names: Reargunner, Jello Butt, Ass Bandit to name but three.
Superman and the super wide Superboy fronted up with the lanky Redundant Semen plus cigarettes in tow. It was onto the baht bus and a rattling hour or so to the A.
Graven produced some very eye catching CH3 commemorative polo shirts featuring a direct quote from Chuck Wao:My level of sarcasm depends on your level of stupidity. I say!
First leg was a tough 11 km with trail marked in small playing card size paper printed with a grey graven image on. The picture wasn’t entirely clear and looked like a strange beast buggering a horse, so it was pretty apt I guess.
The hares, according the local pundits, had done a good job and set trail in different directions to what local hares would do. They knew where the trail was heading but not how our CH3 boys would get there.
Most notable on this leg were a steep climb thru long grass and over rocks that went on. And on. We also had a tricky check on the side of a steep hill of rubber trees. Then we had a section where paper was removed and the FRBs continued 300m to find paper but no body shouted back to us looking elsewhere!
After a tricky loop back on paper to another check, mid pack were confused by paper seemingly going two directions and On and check calls coming from different places.
Alice found trail and then a FT. On was called way back in the woods but luckily my eagle eyes spotted three FRBs running across a field behind a wall 400m away so ran thru the FT to join up in short order. Runners behind were confused as they espied the FT. Some followed me, some looped thru the woods. More fool them.
Back in the big ploughed tapioca field, the FRBs, Jello, Chucky and a.n.other had left the immediate check intact. Alas they did so for the next three, all running together as the locals ‘knew’ where it must go.
No check guarding or spreading out. No calling. Although Chucky swears to differ.
The tapioca fields went on and on and the trail inbetween was runnable. After the climb, it was pleasant to run on rutted flattish track. Here the flies descended and every man probably laughed at the hundreds of the critters on the head/hat/back/pack of the man in front, little realizing he was also so festooned.
Finally the hares appeared on trail, beer was near! After a welcome pitstop of water and fruit it was off on the last 4-5km with Jello Butt fcuking up most checks and running off paper the memorable feature. Chucky can be trusted on this point of fact.
Terrain was uneven and broken, we went thru tapioca fields and some shiggy before hitting a big road, crossing and then more tapioca fields.
The FRBs and paper disappeared behind a building and all was quiet.
Suddenly I saw coloured shirts running across my front way on the other side of another tapioca field and ran from ridge to ridge across the wide expanse and there was the A site, a few hundred meters to the left.
All in I clocked up 11km but FRBs may have done 12km or should have done. The rain after the set didn’t help our valiant hares but overall they did a sterling job and it was extremely refreshing to meet and mingle with Pattaya men.
OnOnOn at M Club? shall remain cloudy for various reasons, although the portions were fabulous and succulent. The pizzas I mean.
Onon,
Alice