1st June – CH4 – Alice & Spitz Spunk

The sky was gloaming but the pack set off full of vim at 5 precisely after Alice found out his watch had stopped at 4:44 when some kind sir asked about the hare brief as it was 4:58!
Co- hare Spitz Spunk was also operating on Alice Mean Time as he missed his own hare brief by ten minutes!
HRA, Cumalot and Obscene hove to after the event with mumblings about invisible signs. Cumalot was driving, blame the navigator!
Obscene scampered off paper and off trail into a field after 50m, an excellent start!
The calls of the pack had receded as they crossed the field to a break in the wire fence. First circle took them right, then inbetween houses to an overgrown orchard. The tall grass was wet and long, but Kwazi suggested mowing it next time, and Frozen volunteered his tractor.
A v check took the pack further into the dense orchard and a tricky circle went left and around following the fence line. A bamboo gate could have been on, but wasn’t! The pack headed back to a False Trail that Sherman hit first. On On back and right back out to the road. A circle took the trail left and into another property through another big bamboo fence. ChuckWao was running well but got all but two checks wrong! Sherman was steaming but also taking wrong options and soon Obscene was in the van with Blows Herself.
A circle at a flooded quarry may have been ripped off but Blows Herself reckoned a run around the quarry was in the hares’ minds. She was right. Forest trail followed, partly used by FD and CW in reverse a few weeks ago and after about 35 mins Alice and Spitz heard ChackWao calling as he rumbled down the track towards the beer stop.
This humble institution was honoured by most but the circle check next up foxed the FRBs. Eventually Blows Herself called it loudly but the mad, barking dogs made her calls unintelligible to some. Kwazi and Frozen both ignored paper and went the wrong way, much to the hares’ delight.
Frozen reappeared and cadged a lift back, the hares just about returning in time to mark the last 200m of trail as the heavens descended and the trail turned into muddy quagmire. Kudos to ChackWao for excellent FRB behaviour and nimble Obscene who came thru the pack to pole position. Blows Herself, Poo, Kwaz, Sherman all ploughed home in short order with Sherman claiming to have found all three Falsies first! SheepShagger, Jeff, Forest Dump, ABB, PiPi, Happy Ending and her sis, and Cumalot came in next and some hashers appeared from the wrong direction having followed known roads home, HRA, Shagless, no names mentioned.
The circle was held under the cramped but necessary front stoop shelter of a new build home as rain cascaded down. Ben Dover entertained us all as he got his truck stuck in the mud attempting a 3 point turn. Does Nothing had the last splash and confirmed Chacky was finally a real man as he’d got his feet wet.